The other evening, I was sitting on my couch watching Oprah's Lifeclass (or it might have been Super Soul Sunday - I can't remember because I watch them both). But the exact show is actually not relevant. Anyway, I was sitting there in bliss because I love learning. Even if I have already learned the lesson they are teaching on the show, I love to see other people in the process of learning. It's exciting! Gee, maybe that's why I became a professor, huh? :) #geekedout
But here's the sad reality. I was also sitting there thinking about how I used to read books a lot more than I do now. The only books I typically read are the non-fiction self-helpish / spiritual kinds. In other words, I don't do novels. Okay, let me confess. I did go through my Danielle Steel phase right after college, and I read the Fifty Shades of Grey series - but only to see what all the fuss was about (don't judge me! Lol). But that's about it. I guess I just see books as a learning tool, and fiction doesn't do much except exercise my imagination (not that there's anything wrong with that).
So, why don't I read much anymore? I could come up with a whole list of reasons - busy with raising kids, career, feeling like I've reached a saturation point sometimes with information. And those are all true. But if I'm really honest with myself, I have to admit that social media sucks up my time too (just Facebook, really). Now don't get me wrong, it's not like I'm the kind of person who posts 20 times a day and takes selfies at every turn. But I do like to 'see what everyone is up to' on Facebook. I never really added up how much time I spend doing that, but I'm sure it's more than I care to admit.
And here's a scary statistic based on research - the average person spends 3.5 hours a day on social media! Holy Batman!! That's crazy. Think about what we could all accomplish with that time if we didn't 'waste' it. I'm pretty sure I don't spend that much time on Facebook, but still. I think you get my point.
So that got me to thinking about why we should all probably scale back on social media. Here are some of my top reasons:
1. It gives you time to read a book and exercise your mind.
Whether it's a self-help book or a dirty novel, at least your're exercising your brain and imagination. Maybe I'm crazy, but I think that's probably better than posting selfies all day. Just saying.
2. It gives you time to spend with your family and friends.
I think a lot of people have lost the art of face-to-face conversation. I know adults who post on their siblings' walls instead of going out to dinner together (when they live in the same town). That's sad. And I think it's especially important to teach the younger generation that social media is actually not 'social.' But we adults have to model that behavior for them.
3. It means that you are living consciously.
One of the BIG messages that I teach in all my classes is to stop living unconsciously. In other words, take your blinders off and look at yourself. Why do you do what you do? If you just answered, "Ummm...I dunno," well then you are not living consciously. When I ask my kids that question and they give me the 'I don't know' answer, I always say, "Well if you don't know why you behave that way, then who does?!?!?" In other words have a reason for doing what you do. If you want to spend 3.5 hours on social media a day, that's cool. But at least know why you're doing it (relaxation? laughing at the complainers? entertainment? being nosy?).
So, does this mean I'm getting off Facebook? No. But I am definitely going to make sure that I take more time to read. If you are over the age of 25, try to think about what you did with your time before Facebook or Twitter sucked it away. Then get back acting like you are still in the 'Stone Age' - the days before social media.
I know we all live in a society where we worship technology, but maybe we should get back to the basics (don't get me started on the people lined up for 12 blocks and camping out for weeks just to get the new iPhone 6!). After all, was life really that bad before Facebook? Honestly, I think in a lot of ways, it was better.
Okay, next time I think I'm going to write about the iPhone 6 ... and oh boy do I have a lot to say about that ...
Until then, I'm going to go read a good book and ignore my 'non-iPhone' phone for a while ... I hope you do too!
I have a confession. I have some 'control issues.' But when I say 'control issues,' that doesn't mean that I like to control other people. We might all want to change people, but I have found through experience that it is just frustrating and exhausting. And - it doesn't work.
The type of control I'm talking about is controlling my life. In other words, planning my life, setting my destination, taking action, and expecting to get where I planned to go. I can't tell you how many times that I have tried to plan things only to come up against a "locked door." You know what I'm talking about. It's a situation where no matter what you try, it just doesn't work out for some reason.
Here's an example. For about a year now, I have been planning on creating some video courses. There are two websites in particular that are dedicated to selling video classes that people make themselves. So, I got the right camera. I got the right microphone. I got the right lighting. I even found someone to do the editing for me. But for some bizarre reason, whenever I submitted my 'test videos,' they always get turned down for one reason or another. Sometimes it's the background noise in the audio. Sometimes it's the lighting. But regardless of the reason, they always tell me it's not ready. One thing always happened though: I wanted to pull my hair out in frustration!!
Ohhhhh ... you have NO idea how crazy this made me! Suddenly I could relate to what it meant to "go postal." (don't worry, I have not really gone that crazy!! LOL) But after I a while, I took a break, stepped back and thought, "Hmmmm. I wonder if there is a reason that this isn't flowing right other than the fact that I'm a technological idiot?" I always teach people to not fight against life too much. And I always use the metaphor of pointing your "boat" downstream and going with the flow of the Universe. In other words ... don't paddle upstream. And as much as I hate to admit it, I wasn't taking my own advice. I was paddling upstream. And it wasn't getting me anywhere.
Think about it. If you were in a canoe and you were trying to paddle upstream, would you get anywhere? No. Would you get tired, frustrated, and exhausted? Yes. So, really, what's the point? Just turn your boat around and aim it downstream. In other words ...
DON'T PADDLE UPSTREAM.
Just don't do it.
So, what happened when I stopped paddling upstream with my video classes? A miracle. Okay, not exactly a miracle, but it was something so super cool that I am just amazed at what the Universe dropped into my lap out of the clear blue sky. Here it is ...
I am officially the new Editor of ABetterMeMagazine.com. Okay, I know you're thinking, "Hey, that's great Carol, but what does that have to do with video classes?" Well, I'm glad you asked. I will tell you.
Since I am the Editor, I can do anything I want with the site (for the most part). And one of those things will be video classes. And do you know what that means? Yep. No more being at the mercy of other sites approving or not approving my videos. Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to produce garbage, but I now have the freedom and control that I always wanted to have over my videos.
But it's not just about the videos. I'm mostly just super excited about this opportunity because I have so many BIG plans for the site! Here are just a few highlights:
1. I will be hosting a video web show called A Better Me TV. I will interview all sorts of people - both experts and regular people - who will help viewers become a better person and be happier.
2. I am in the process of developing an Expert Network. I am hand-chosing ROCK STAR experts to help everyone in their journey to become better.
3. A Marketplace - lots of books, audios, coaching and much, much more!
4. Free webinars!
5. Video Classes!
I could go on and on, but these are just some of the exciting things that will be coming up in the near future.
So, I invite you all to come join me on ABetterMeMagazine.com. We're going to have a great time helping each other learn and grow and become BETTER. Oh, and come 'like' us on Facebook too. Click here to do that. :)
Meanwhile, I want you to look at your life and see where you are paddling upstream. What are you fighting for - or against - that is just not working out? Once you figure it out, I suggest that you turn your boat around, too. Every time I have done that in my life, it always works out a million times better.
Have a great week, and BON VOYAGE! :)
Dr. Carol Morgan &
Check out our website:
Who I Am: