![]() Are you frustrated with online dating? Or perhaps you’ve never done it before and don’t even know where to start? Well, you’ve come to the right place. Hi everyone! I’m Carol, an online dating coach and professor. It’s my passion to help people through the online dating process and beyond. I met the love of my life on an online dating site (see the About page for more information about that), so I know all about if from both a personal and professional perspective.And I am living proof that online dating can work! If you want to know my full story, click here to read more about my own personal journey. And since you’re reading this blog, it tells me that you are frustrated enough to want to find an online dating coach to help you find the love or your life too, right? So, let’s dive right in! First of all, I want you know that we’ve all been there – wanting to find love, but it’s just not happening. You scratch your head and wonder why it’s so difficult. After all, the movies and TV shows all make it look so easy, right? Heck, even the prostitute in the classic movie, Pretty Woman, found a billionaire to love and they lived happily ever after. So why isn’t it happening for you? Just so know, you are NOT alone. There are countless singles in the world who feel exactly the same way you do. In fact, I used to be one of them too – before I figured how to do it right. You might be young and want to find someone to marry and have a family with. Or, you might be newly divorced and have no idea where to start to find your next relationship. Either way, you could probably use some help. And that’s why you should consider working with an online dating coach. You might be thinking… a dating coach? Why do I need one of those? And where do I even find one? Where do I even look? Do need a dating coach near me, or can I find one anywhere? There are so many questions you probably want answered before you decide to hire a dating coach. So, let’s just start by talking about why you would even need a dating coach at all. ***Side Note: If you’re more of a video kind of person than a reader, you can check out my interview with Dr. Steven Cangiano right here. I explain all about the online dating coaching process.*** Why You Should Work With an Online Dating Coach
Many people might think that working with an online dating coach signifies some sort of “weakness” on their part. This couldn’t be farther from the truth! It’s actually a sign of strength to admit that you could use a little help. Let’s start with some common reasons that people seek out working with me. Too little time. You are most likely a very busy person! You have a demanding career, and at the end of the day, the last thing you want to do is go looking online for someone to date. That’s what your coach can do for you. You can just sit back and relax while they do all the work. Unfocused about who you’re looking for. You might not have a clue about who you think you should be dating. You might think you do, but a coach will really help you get clear on the RIGHT type of person you should be going after. Bad online profile. Not everyone is good at writing an online dating profile. I admit – it’s not easy! And that’s okay. If you’re not getting people to respond to your messages, let a dating coach re-write it and see how your success improves. You’re shy or have awkward social skills. Hey, not everyone can be an extrovert or the life of the party! And that’s perfectly fine. Just because you’re shy or might have a hard time making small talk, calming your nerves, or choosing date activities doesn’t mean you can’t have a great dating life. Let a coach help you with that. The opposite sex confuses you. I know, I know, people can be confusing! Men are women are quite different, and if you’re having a hard time reading the opposite sex or figuring them out, then a dating coach can help you with that as well. You have low self-confidence. People are attracted to confidence, and if you feel like you don’t have much of that, a dating coach can certainly help you work on yourself and project a better image on a date. You’ve never had a long-term relationship. Maybe you’ve never even had a relationship before, and you don’t know where to start. A dating coach is a wealth of knowledge about what a healthy and happy relationship looks like, and they can teach you. You found a match and want to keep him or her. Maybe you were lucky enough to find a great person, but you’re afraid you’re going to blow it with them. A dating coach can be there for you every step of the way to make sure you do the right things. Now that we know why you probably need an online dating coach, let’s look at why you don’t necessarily need to look for one near you. What is it Like Working with an Online Dating Coach? The unknown is always scary. Even when you are excited about investing money in something like your love life, it is difficult to know whether you should actually take the step and make that commitment. So, let’s talk about what it is actually like to work with a coach like me. I do different things so let’s take them one-by-one. Here’s what I do: Written review of your online dating profile. Most people don’t know how to write an effective profile that will actually get them dates. So, if a client just wants me to give them tips about what to do differently, I provide a written review and suggestions for improvement. Re-writing your online dating profile – or writing it for the first time if you are new to online dating. If you aren’t the best writer and want me to re-write your profile for you, then I can do that too. 30-minute advice & coaching call… or Skype. In this advice and coaching call, I will review your online dating profile if you have one. If you don’t, I will give you suggestions for how to create it. We will also discuss your dating and relationship goals as time provides. Advice through email. You can email me a question in as much detail as possible. I will then respond with a long, advice-filled email that gives you real-world advice and actions to take. Advice and coaching through text. This will give you real-time, on-the-spot advice whenever you need it. I give advice for anything! Even if you’re on a date and don’t know what to say or do in the moment. One month of in-depth coaching. When people are ready to dive deep with me, then they choose the one-month coaching package. This is what I do for you over the course of the month:
With the Invention of Skype, It’s no Longer Necessary to Work with a Dating Coach Near You Technology has certainly transformed our everyday lives. You might not be old enough to remember a life without the internet, but then again you might be. In the old days, if you wanted to find a dating coach, you probably would have to look in the yellow pages of the phone book, but you probably still wouldn’t find any listed. Even if you did, you would be limited to finding a dating coach near you. But now, your options are limitless. You could live anywhere in the world and work with a dating coach halfway across the globe. Technology has made it so convenient. You could be sitting in your pajamas at home talking to your coach. How awesome is that? You Should Find a Dating Coach Who Has What You Want (A Relationship, For Example) If you were wanting to hire a financial investor, would you hire one with a low balance in their bank account? Of course not! You want to hire someone who really knows what they’re doing with money, right? And if they can’t do it for themselves, how can they do it for you? The same is true for a dating coach. It’s best to find someone who has been through it and has had success. I know some people who are dating coaches who have been happily married for 20 years. While that sounds great, if they have been with the same person that long, then they have no idea how the dating world has changed in the last couple of decades (especially online dating). And they have definitely never done online dating! It’s almost impossible to give great advice about online dating to a client if a coach has never been through the process themselves. While it’s great that they know what a successful marriage is like, they still don’t have the recent dating experience that some others do. As I just said, you want someone who has been through it themselves. However, it’s not enough to just find a dating coach who has done dating and online dating with little or no success. Yes, it’s not easy to find “the one” online. But it’s definitely possible! What I’m trying to say here is that you should ask questions about your coach before you hire them. Ask about their dating and relationship experience. Even if they’ve had failed relationships (as we all do), what have they learned from it? How do they use their successes and failures to help their clients? The Bottom Line If you have been considering the possibility of working with an online dating coach, hopefully I have given you enough reasons to actually pursue it. Everyone wants to find someone to spend their life with, and a coach can certainly maximize your odds of finding that special someone that you can spend happily ever after with. And if you still prefer to work with an online dating coach near you, then that’s perfectly fine. But a virtual coach can offer you so many more advantages, just like the ones I discussed here. So, I suggest you go for it… what do you have to lose? If you are ready to hire a coach, then I would LOVE to help YOU find your happily ever after! For more information about my coaching services, click here. Or click here to send me an email if you have any questions! Wishing you love, Carol :)
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![]() I’ve been there, so I know how you feel. You are about ready to give up on online dating … and maybe even finding love at all! Am I right? If you’re reading this, I probably am. When I got divorced, I had two small children. And online dating was really my only option. But I had no clue how to write a good online dating profile! So, through some trial and error (and a lot of research), I finally figured it out. Not only did I figure out how to write a good online dating profile for myself, I started helping other people do it too. When they started having much better luck too, I knew I was on to something! And on top of that, I also got really good at reading other people’s profiles. I learned to see and interpret exactly who they are based on their photos, what they say, and what they don’t say. Once I finally figured all of this out… it happened! I FINALLY met the love of my life (who is that awesome man in the photo with me above and to your right). And you guessed it – we met on an online dating website. You see, your profile is everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. It is the “face to the world” that you are putting out there. Everything in your profile carries a message to potential dates – both good and bad. If you go to a job interview, don’t you dress up, prepare for questions, look your best, communicate well, and just put your overall “best self” out there? Yes, you do! So that’s EXACTLY what you should be doing with your online dating profile too. Your profile is like your “resume” for a date or potential relationship. And just like a job search, you will have a lot of competition! So, you really need to stand out if you want to get the kind of dates you want. But how do you write a good profile? I’m going to tell you some of the highlights, and things you MUST do if you want to find a quality man or woman. How to Write Your Online Dating Profile Before I get into the specifics of how to write a good online dating profile, I just wanted to let you know that I am running a special until March 30, 2020. I will write or re-write your online dating profile for HALF OFF ($99 value, now $49 for a limited time). Just click here! Now, let's get started. There are so many different components that you have to pay close attention to if you want to have success in the online dating world. So, let’s start with your photos. Do’s and Don’ts of Photos Most people don’t pay enough attention to their photos. They just slap some up there on their profile and never give it a second thought. But your photos are the FIRST thing that potential dates see about you! It’s your first impression. So, if you don’t put a great photo(s) out there, then they will pass you by. Here are the “don’ts” of photos choosing… DON’T… Use old photos. You might think you still look like that, but you probably don’t! Make them recent – no more than 3 years old. And if you look different than you did 3 years ago, take photos of you TODAY! Use sexy photos. Do NOT Put sexy photos of yourself on your profile. No low-cut, cleavage-revealing shirts for the ladies. No bare-chested photos for the guys (unless it’s on a beach). No duck-face selfies. In fact, NO SELFIES at all. Put pictures of your motorcycle, boat, house, car, dog, or fish you just caught (you get the idea). People want to date YOU, not your motorcycle. They want to see what YOU look like. Use a profile photo of you way off in the distance. People can’t see your face. If you want to use a photo like this, fine. But not as a profile photo. Make sure you have plenty of close-up photos without sunglasses on. Sunglasses imply that you are hiding something (other than your eyes). Use a photo with bad lighting. I mean, you can’t really see what a person looks like if it’s in bad lighting, right? Make your photos bright so people don’t have to struggle to imagine your face. Use crowd photos. You don’t want potential dates to look and wonder, “Hmmm…I wonder which one is him/her?” If you want to use a group photo to show you are social, then at least identify which one you are. And make it tasteful. Frown. Especially your profile photo. Would you want to date someone who only has a scrowl on their face in photos? Of course not, because they don’t look very friendly. Or happy. Remember, you are putting your best self out there. Don’t make your image negative. Take your photos at a BAD ANGLE. You might be as beautiful as Angelina Jolie or handsome as Brad Pitt, but if you choose a photo from a bad angle, it will not reveal what you truly look like. Examples of the DON'TS... Do… Smile in your profile photo. Make the lighting bright. Look into the camera. Have a close-up of your face. Make it a recent photo. Have someone else take it for you (not a selfie). Have at least one full-body photo. Let’s face it – people’s faces are not necessarily representative of their entire body. People want to see what you look like – your whole self! And make sure they are recent photos! Make your photos RESPECTABLE. Research shows that we teach people how to treat us. And that all starts in the online dating world with our photos. If you post sexually provocative photos or ones that are otherwise inappropriate, you not attract quality people. You will only attract people who want one thing (sex). Use crowd photos. I know I said this was a “don’t,” but if you are a social person and want to convey that, then it’s okay. But keep the group small. Make sure you’re not doing anything too crazy. Finally, identify who you are by writing a caption for the photo. EXAMPLES OF DO'S... What to Say in Your Profile Now that we know a bit about what kind of photos to choose, what are you supposed to say? Even though your photos could make or break whether someone wants to talk to you, what you say in your profile is a close second in terms of their decision-making process. Don’t say… Nothing. Because then it will say something like … “This user has yet to write about himself.” That’s not a good first impression. “I hate talking about myself.” People might think that you are insecure, and therefore, you have nothing good to say about yourself. People like partners who are confident. Not the kind who are will need constant reassurance. “If you want to know something about me, just ask.” This implies that you are lazy and haven’t taken the time to actually tell people about who are. Type in all capital letters. NO ONE TYPES IN CAPITAL LETTERS ON A REGULAR BASIS. IT MAKES IT HARD TO READ. AND IT FEELS LIKE THE PERSON IS YELLING AT YOU!!! Use improper grammar. “Heyyy,, whazup. Im Jane n i wanna boyfrend i lik movies do u…i lik to walk on beech I have2 kidz that r kinda fun if ya wanna no more abut me jus aks.” Would you date someone who wrote like this? If you would, you probably shouldn’t. This kind of writing implies that they don’t know how to present themselves in a positive manner. Write just one or two sentences. “Hi and thanks for visiting my profile. I am a receptionist and I have two boys. I am looking for the love of my life. Is it you?” You need to actually tell potential dates who you and what you are looking for. Do you actually know anything about this person? No. Lie or stretch the true. There’s an older country song by Brad Paisley called “I’m So Much Cooler Online.” Basically, it’s about a guy living in his parents’ basement who says he’s rich and a super model when he’s online. Don’t do this! In fact, don’t even stretch the truth at all. Just be honest! Don’t be negative. “If you’re a Born Again Christian, then I’m running for the hills!” “No photo, no reply!” “I’m so sick of people on this site who play mind games!” Don’t say stuff like this! Who wants to go out with someone who starts their profile off with negativity? It might all be true, but rely on your own instincts to choose the right person – don’t go off on a rant about what or who you hate. Summing it Up Writing a great online dating profile is not an easy task. It takes a lot of time and thought. But if you know what you’re doing, then you will dramatically increase your chances of finding the right person! And don’t forget, it’s not all about YOUR profile. You also need to act like an investigator and interpret other people’s profiles before you ever meet them. Because you are worthy and deserve a quality person! I would LOVE to help you with your online dating journey! I have several services available: * Online Dating Profile Review * Online Dating Profile Writing * 30-Minute Coaching Call * Advice Through Email * Text Coaching * One-month coaching package Click here for more information! I can't wait to help you find your happily ever after! Please contact me if you have ANY questions. Wishing you love, Carol 😊 |
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