Am I right?
If you’re reading this, I probably am.
When I got divorced, I had two small children. And online dating was really my only option. But I had no clue how to write a good online dating profile! So, through some trial and error (and a lot of research), I finally figured it out.
Not only did I figure out how to write a good online dating profile for myself, I started helping other people do it too. When they started having much better luck too, I knew I was on to something!
And on top of that, I also got really good at reading other people’s profiles. I learned to see and interpret exactly who they are based on their photos, what they say, and what they don’t say.
Once I finally figured all of this out… it happened! I FINALLY met the love of my life (who is that awesome man in the photo with me above and to your right). And you guessed it – we met on an online dating website.
You see, your profile is everything. And I mean EVERYTHING.
It is the “face to the world” that you are putting out there. Everything in your profile carries a message to potential dates – both good and bad.
If you go to a job interview, don’t you dress up, prepare for questions, look your best, communicate well, and just put your overall “best self” out there?
Yes, you do!
So that’s EXACTLY what you should be doing with your online dating profile too.
Your profile is like your “resume” for a date or potential relationship. And just like a job search, you will have a lot of competition! So, you really need to stand out if you want to get the kind of dates you want.
But how do you write a good profile? I’m going to tell you some of the highlights, and things you MUST do if you want to find a quality man or woman.
How to Write Your Online Dating Profile
Before I get into the specifics of how to write a good online dating profile, I just wanted to let you know that I am running a special until March 30, 2020. I will write or re-write your online dating profile for HALF OFF ($99 value, now $49 for a limited time). Just click here!
Now, let's get started.
There are so many different components that you have to pay close attention to if you want to have success in the online dating world.
So, let’s start with your photos.
Do’s and Don’ts of Photos
Most people don’t pay enough attention to their photos. They just slap some up there on their profile and never give it a second thought.
But your photos are the FIRST thing that potential dates see about you! It’s your first impression. So, if you don’t put a great photo(s) out there, then they will pass you by.
Here are the “don’ts” of photos choosing…
Use old photos.
You might think you still look like that, but you probably don’t! Make them recent – no more than 3 years old. And if you look different than you did 3 years ago, take photos of you TODAY!
Use sexy photos.
Do NOT Put sexy photos of yourself on your profile. No low-cut, cleavage-revealing shirts for the ladies. No bare-chested photos for the guys (unless it’s on a beach). No duck-face selfies. In fact, NO SELFIES at all.
Put pictures of your motorcycle, boat, house, car, dog, or fish you just caught (you get the idea).
People want to date YOU, not your motorcycle. They want to see what YOU look like.
Use a profile photo of you way off in the distance.
People can’t see your face. If you want to use a photo like this, fine. But not as a profile photo. Make sure you have plenty of close-up photos without sunglasses on. Sunglasses imply that you are hiding something (other than your eyes).
Use a photo with bad lighting.
I mean, you can’t really see what a person looks like if it’s in bad lighting, right? Make your photos bright so people don’t have to struggle to imagine your face.
Use crowd photos.
You don’t want potential dates to look and wonder, “Hmmm…I wonder which one is him/her?” If you want to use a group photo to show you are social, then at least identify which one you are. And make it tasteful.
Especially your profile photo. Would you want to date someone who only has a scrowl on their face in photos? Of course not, because they don’t look very friendly. Or happy. Remember, you are putting your best self out there. Don’t make your image negative.
Take your photos at a BAD ANGLE.
You might be as beautiful as Angelina Jolie or handsome as Brad Pitt, but if you choose a photo from a bad angle, it will not reveal what you truly look like.
Examples of the DON'TS...
Smile in your profile photo.
Make the lighting bright. Look into the camera. Have a close-up of your face. Make it a recent photo. Have someone else take it for you (not a selfie).
Have at least one full-body photo.
Let’s face it – people’s faces are not necessarily representative of their entire body. People want to see what you look like – your whole self! And make sure they are recent photos!
Make your photos RESPECTABLE.
Research shows that we teach people how to treat us. And that all starts in the online dating world with our photos. If you post sexually provocative photos or ones that are otherwise inappropriate, you not attract quality people. You will only attract people who want one thing (sex).
Use crowd photos.
I know I said this was a “don’t,” but if you are a social person and want to convey that, then it’s okay. But keep the group small. Make sure you’re not doing anything too crazy. Finally, identify who you are by writing a caption for the photo.
EXAMPLES OF DO'S...
What to Say in Your Profile
Now that we know a bit about what kind of photos to choose, what are you supposed to say? Even though your photos could make or break whether someone wants to talk to you, what you say in your profile is a close second in terms of their decision-making process.
Because then it will say something like … “This user has yet to write about himself.” That’s not a good first impression.
“I hate talking about myself.”
People might think that you are insecure, and therefore, you have nothing good to say about yourself. People like partners who are confident. Not the kind who are will need constant reassurance.
“If you want to know something about me, just ask.”
This implies that you are lazy and haven’t taken the time to actually tell people about who are.
Type in all capital letters.
NO ONE TYPES IN CAPITAL LETTERS ON A REGULAR BASIS. IT MAKES IT HARD TO READ. AND IT FEELS LIKE THE PERSON IS YELLING AT YOU!!!
Use improper grammar.
“Heyyy,, whazup. Im Jane n i wanna boyfrend i lik movies do u…i lik to walk on beech I have2 kidz that r kinda fun if ya wanna no more abut me jus aks.”
Would you date someone who wrote like this? If you would, you probably shouldn’t. This kind of writing implies that they don’t know how to present themselves in a positive manner.
Write just one or two sentences.
“Hi and thanks for visiting my profile. I am a receptionist and I have two boys. I am looking for the love of my life. Is it you?”
You need to actually tell potential dates who you and what you are looking for. Do you actually know anything about this person? No.
Lie or stretch the true.
There’s an older country song by Brad Paisley called “I’m So Much Cooler Online.” Basically, it’s about a guy living in his parents’ basement who says he’s rich and a super model when he’s online. Don’t do this! In fact, don’t even stretch the truth at all. Just be honest!
Don’t be negative.
“If you’re a Born Again Christian, then I’m running for the hills!”
“No photo, no reply!”
“I’m so sick of people on this site who play mind games!”
Don’t say stuff like this! Who wants to go out with someone who starts their profile off with negativity? It might all be true, but rely on your own instincts to choose the right person – don’t go off on a rant about what or who you hate.
Summing it Up
Writing a great online dating profile is not an easy task. It takes a lot of time and thought. But if you know what you’re doing, then you will dramatically increase your chances of finding the right person!
And don’t forget, it’s not all about YOUR profile. You also need to act like an investigator and interpret other people’s profiles before you ever meet them. Because you are worthy and deserve a quality person!
I would LOVE to help you with your online dating journey! I have several services available:
* Online Dating Profile Review
* Online Dating Profile Writing
* 30-Minute Coaching Call
* Advice Through Email
* Text Coaching
* One-month coaching package
Click here for more information!
I can't wait to help you find your happily ever after! Please contact me if you have ANY questions.
Wishing you love,